An Open Letter to Guys Who Grind Up Against Me On the Dance Floor

Saturday, April 14, 2012 Andrea Lo 1 Comments

Dear guys who grind up against me on the dance floor,

I am a 21-year-old girl, who likes to go out with my friends. You are probably the same age, out on the lash with your entourage of boys; or perhaps you are a businessman in your 30's, with a bulging wallet to match your sex drive. No matter; we are all out at the club to have a good time.

There are a few grievances I would like to address. I am not sure whether it is the way I dress, or the way I dance, which have caught your attention and encouraged you to come up and start grinding against me. I understand that everyone is under the influence of alcohol and you may be somewhat inebriated; however, this does not make your behaviour endurable. I struggle to decide what is more disconcerting: the fact that you have made no effort to even ask me my name, or that you feel it is acceptable to invade a complete stranger's personal space. Most disturbingly, your dance moves are certainly less than desirable, and some may even say that they are comparable to a low-budget remake of Dirty Dancing. Please, I urge you, put Baby back in the corner and go and join her there.

I have a low tolerance to alcohol — something that might be immediately apparent to you — but this does not make me a piece of meat. Most importantly, as I am well aware of the state I can sometimes find myself in, not only have I become more vigilant in my alcohol intake, but I am also not the type of person to give in to beer goggles. I rely on, and am proud of my sound judgement, which prevents me from ending up with someone like you when the evening draws to a close.

In future, I would appreciate it if you could keep your distance. If you do feel that my assessment of you is an unfair one or that you have been misunderstood, please feel free to begin a conversation with me, preferably without a less than stellar pick up line involving my race or my ass. Then maybe we can work something out from there.

Not yours, not unless you stop grinding up against me,
Anonymous Troll

1 comment: